


i dont know what to title this but roys in love with riza thanks

by dv1v1



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: F/F, You W, You Will Read My Content. You Will Enjoy My Lesbians., roy mustang closet transbian
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-29
Updated: 2018-03-29
Packaged: 2019-04-14 12:02:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 938
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14135661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dv1v1/pseuds/dv1v1
Summary: im gay and sad. whats upalso note, roy's a closeted trans lesbian in this. adn shes very emotional about riza





	i dont know what to title this but roys in love with riza thanks

"what is hawkeye like, y'know, outside of work? you spend alot of time with her."   
  
edward asked this question earlier today. at the time, it took you a while to answer, and you feel it wasn't enough to satisfy what she's really like.  
  
what is riza hawkeye like?   
  
what _is_ she like?  
  
riza hawkeye has been there for you for years. you've known her since you were a teenager. you knew her when you were awkward and unsure of your place in the world, grasping at the chance to prove yourself worthy of being an alchemist. you knew her when you found that chance. you knew her when you started training, the grueling days spent at camp only made comfortable by her smile every evening, when you just pass by her in the dinner hall. you knew her when the real horrors of being in the military started, when the night terrors got bad, when you swore, _you swore_ that something was out to get you, when the voices of the people you were forced to kill rang out in your head. her voice cut through those like a cold knife, not unkind, but solid enough to ground you. a foundation for you to get a hold of yourself.  
  
you've known her forever, it feels like. but what is she like?  
  
riza hawkeye is a sharpshooter. she's a bird of prey. she's never off her mark, she never makes a mistake, she never misses. she fights with such fury you have to stop yourself from gaping in awe at her. she lunges, she shoots, she's a flurry of blue and gold and ferocity. more than once you've seen her break a man's jaw, and more than once have you seen her take aim and hit someone before you can even see them. she's a hawk, circling, talons always out, always on guard, always protecting _you._ you tried, but you couldn't help but falling hopelessly in love with her.  
  
she's as strong as she is gentle. her hands are calloused, they're rough and worn down, they've touched things humans have never meant to touch, but when you hold her hands in your equally-soiled-hands, you feel like maybe, just maybe, despite everything that's happened, you're okay. you will be okay. you will be okay as long as riza is here with you. when the nights get bad and you can only find yourself panicking, afraid of something watching you, afraid of another _having to hide everything from everyone or you'll die,_ she holds you _._ she holds you in her strong, firm arms, and you melt like candle wax. she's seen every part of you, you've seen every part of her. you know each others deepest secrets and regrets.  
   
you've seen her at her lowest. you've seen the deep, endless gaping maw of _regret_ behind her eyes. a hole that couldn't be filled by itself. a sadness that couldn't be fixed, a wound that wouldn't heal. you've seen how she looks at her hands, how she sometimes stares out the window, how sudden loud noises make her jumpy. you love her, so, so much. you're just as broken and bruised and neither of you will ever be fixed but that's okay, you're both okay.  
  
she's like the sun, bright, golden, radiating with _kindness_ and _courage_ and _everything_ good in the world. you're the moon, orbiting a broken, beaten down world that you've sworn to fix, and all you can do is bask in her light and try to reflect it back on everything else. she's like a warm fire on a cold, bitter winter night. you bask in her warmth. even when she flickers, even when she's burning low, you still rekindle that flame.   
  
when you told her "i love you" for the first time, it felt like everything changed.  
  
as the words passed your lips, you felt like a weight had been lifted off your chest. when she said "i love you too", you felt like you could fly. you felt like icarus, flying as far as possible towards the warm sun, but you didn't feel like your wings would melt. you felt like nothing mattered except her, that the war, the fighting and the chaos and the worrying about what might be out there wasn't _there_. you felt like the world was brighter and fuller and everything was so much better. your love wasn't like the raging summer of short-lived relationships, or the cold wind of something _worse_ , it felt like a spring. a warm day in may when you can just see the leaves growing back from the trees, when the grass grew a little taller, and when flowers bloomed everywhere. it felt like an autum harvest where everything you need is right there, right there, ready for when the times got hard. she was always there for you. she was your rock, your foundation, your _home_.   
  
you've never really felt at home in your own skin before, but she makes you feel at home. one day, a long time ago, you realized that you felt homesick. that was the couple months you and hawkeye were separated. you felt homesick because she was your home.  
  
she's not like anything. she's her. she's beautiful and furious and gentle and kind and home and she's all of those things, but she's her, and you love her and she loves you.  
  
you remember what you told edward, that it wasn't enough.  
  
"she's a... she's a party animal. she's a fan of nice, homey restaurants. she always dresses business casual when not in uniform-- oh! and she likes to steal my cologne."


End file.
